To Provoke…Or Not To Provoke? That is the Question that has Social Media On Fire

To Provoke…Or Not To Provoke?

4817540034_300_arguing_couple_e1308582382674_answer_9_xlargeWe had a post recently about the backlash from the Ray Rice situation where he was suspended for only 2 games for a domestic abuse incident which left his soon to be wife unconscious. From that came the ESPN’s commentator’s Steve A. Smith’s comments about how women should not be held blameless when it comes to “provoking” a man to violence.  While Steven A. Smith made both a twitter and on-air apology for saying that…..the issue is still on fire on social media.

From our Facebook page we had women who also felt domestic violence was wrong…but felt that women “can” be an instigator in some situations.

Angela Veney commented: I don’t think SAS needed to apologize. I am so sick and tired of MEN and women riding down on Ray Rice and for wrongly making Domestic Violence a purely women’s issue. 

It is a human issue and believe it or not MEN are victims too! If it’s wrong for a man to hit a woman then its equally as wrong for a woman to hit a man. …..Yes women can provoke men into violence. All of you who say, oh you could never provoke me into violence, let someone mess with one of your kids. Yeah, I thought so. Your kids are your “trigger point” just like everyone has a trigger point and pushed and aggravated enough, you’re gonna snap just like the rest of us humans……because you’re prone to imperfection like the rest of us.

Yolanda Latimer Washington commented: I agree and yes I have provoked some men and we have gone toe to toe…You are right..

Chandra Mackall commented: Preach Angela Veney!! Women and men kill me with that foolishness. NOBODY deserves to get hit and if u hit someone u need to EXPECT to get hit back. I know one thing, a chick can jump bad and hit my son if she wants to, she gon be picking herself up off the floor wondering what happened. And my girls know not to hit a man either, but if they do to expect the same. We dont play that double standard ignorance around here. *humph*

Lisa Thomas commented: The man clearly said a man should never put his hands on a woman. He started out saying that. With that said women should…
1. Keep their hands, feet and salava to themselves
2. Stop thinking that it was his exes fault that they got beat and that he won’t beat you. If he beat even 1 he’ll beat you too
3. Leave abusive men. If he hit you once he’ll hit you again. Leave. 
Ok so that’s how we as women avoid being victims of domestic violence.

Even Video Vixen and VH1 Reality personality Melyssa Ford talked about it in a recent interview. She says women “can” put themselves in a situation where they know what buttons to push that will provoke “some” men to react violently.  She even shared her experience when she consciously provoke her boyfriend and got punched in her face.

The overriding point is, everyone agrees that domestic violence is wrong. Everyone agrees that no one should put their hands on another person out of anger.  The division comes when both men and women feel that if there are people who are prone to violence….then, there are also people who provoke and instigate a response that they know may end up with violent repercussions.

What are you thoughts on this issue?

Should men always react……like Jay-Z did in the elevator with Solange and just try to defend themselves without responding aggressively?

Should women be able to sense from past behaviors when their anger and actions may prompt a violent response and cease escalating the situation?

We want to hear from you?


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